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Teaching Life and History
Have you ever heard that old saying, 'parenting is a full-time job.' I have, especially as the birth of our daughter drew closer. It seemed to be all anyone could say to my wife and me. As the words left their mouths, I nodded my agreement. 'Of course it's a full-time job,' I thought. Now that I've got three years as a dad under my belt, I'm starting to understand things a bit clearer.
At work, I clock in and out. With parenting, I'm on call 24/7 (and more if that's even possible). I've been fully trained before I even step out onto the floor for the first time at work. Just before my wife gave birth, we had a few weeks learning about baby health and development. The hospital also showed us a short video telling us that our baby may cry uncontrollably. Other than that, it was a 'learn-as-you-go' situation. Every two weeks, I get a paycheck from my employer. Every two weeks, that paycheck seems to disappear into thin air. Are you starting to see where the analogy breaks down a bit? So, why talk about this? Why point out the obvious: parenting is stressful, not too easy, and way more demanding than a full-time job? I say all of this to remind you, the parent, that sometimes you might feel tired. You might feel at your wit's end. You might want to give up, throw up, or shut down. These are all normal feelings. I've had them. My wife has had them. They come up. The real question is, what do you do in these moments? Do you push the feelings down into some dark space within yourself? Do you smile and repeat the age old mantra 'Parenting is the most rewarding profession?' Do you blow up at your kid, spouse, or significant other, misplacing all of those feelings on those you love the most? Yeah, me too. I've done all of that, multiple times. While I still struggle with those types of actions, I've made a commitment to myself to take the time to find a better way of dealing with these emotions. I'm still developing these guidelines and have failed multiple times in following them. Keep in mind though: failure is not messing up once, twice, or even a hundred times. Failure is giving up entirely. When I'm feeling my lowest, here are four things that I try to do to bring myself back up:
These four suggestions are just that, suggestions. You may need additional help or need to pursue different practices to help you regain your emotional stability. Whatever you need to do, I just ask, please take the time and do it. Your kids need you at your best. I believe in you. Until next time.
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AuthorMy name is Kevin. I'm a husband, a dad and a historian, in that order. Archives
April 2018
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